A poet said :
If a man’s heart is too small to hold a secrete
The heart receives that secrete is even smaller
The secrets of a human is considered a part of his personality , and keeping them is one of his stable behavior and self principle motives ; for he doesn’t want anyone to sneak into his personal entity and know all his hidings and secrets , and make that a way to harm him even with a word that could smear his reputation or a talking that disturb his self peace !
A person is considered as the first and last responsible of his secrets , he should lock on them and not to let his tongue to reveal them if possible , for a secret between more than two is no secret , and so a person would be a captive for hid secret holder and have to obey him , for being worried of revealing his secrets to others , and many people became a victim of blackmailing ; because they gave their secrets to people who doesn’t have integrity or devoutness… , so if you see that sharing your secrets important for you , and revealing your secrets for one of your friends as an outlet that comforts you and provide you with power , we advise you to keep four secrets away of your friends and others ; for the importance of keeping them even if some people doesn’t consider them as secrets ; for revealing them can cause harmful problems , so keeping them is better if not a must …, and theses four are :
1-everything related to your personality ( your habits , income , special situations , precious collectables , relationships ) for some of your friends or siblings may change their behavior if they knew any of them like feeling envy or jealous or looking down at you , or may holding that against you for disgrace or shaming you …, then you will feel regret and worried , and that what was shown by new studies that about eighty five percent of people regret for revealing their private secrets for their friends , for that Al- Imam Al-Sadeq (peace be upon him ) gives an important controller and says : don’t tell your friend a secret unless if saying it to your enemy won’t hurt you ., and that doesn’t mean to be so ambiguous , but we advise you to filter your secrets , and don’t reveal to anyone unless revealing won’t be a danger for you .
2-your future goals and private projects , never talk about it ; because that will weakens your determination to complete and finish it , there were many sayings about this truth includes what Al-Imam Mohammed ben Ali Al-Jawad (peace be upon him) said : “ revealing something before it gets finished will ruin it “ ., and the modern science has confirmed this fact and the psychology , brain, and nerves doctors declared that a person who talks to a close person about his goals and projects which are still in progress and hears praise and compliment for his idea , his brain secretes endorphin that cause self satisfaction and comfort , as if the goal is achieved , and aims to complete it but feels depressed and becomes lazy and feels inaction to complete his goal , or leaves it permanently , for that , psychology doctors advise not to say anything about the future projects and keep them secret until they are accomplished .
3-Everything related to your family and marriage life : some of the common mistakes is the wife says what goes on in her house to her neighbor or friend and even what happens between her and her husband , and as the days passes and she has a quarrel with her neighbor or friend , she starts feeling tense and worried that her friend or neighbor would spread her secret , so the man and wife should keep in what happens in their house , and everything related to their family like private situations and problems ; for they are secrets , plus , sharing these family problems outside may enlarge and complicate them …,Al- Imam Ali (peace be upon him ) said : your secret is your prisoner , if you revealed it you will be its prisoner .
4- good and righteous deeds : sincerity is an important rank in a believer’s life , and to accomplish sincerity , the righteous and good deeds must be keep hidden for not to be proud and pharisaic , and hiding them makes you feel happy while spreading goodness and giveaway for poor people or needed friends and no one knows about it but Allah . Al-Imam Al-Sadeq said : (peace be upon him ) : don’t give in sight of people to praise you , if you did that , you have got your reward , so if you give with your right hand , don’t let the left hand know , for the one you are giving for in secret will reward you in public . and Al-Imam Al-Baqer ( peace be upon him ) talking about his father Al-Imam Al-Sajjad (peace be upon him) said : he used to go out in the darkest nights , carrying a holdall on his back and get to the doors one by one , he knocks and gave who ever come out for him , hand he used to cover his face when he gives a poor to not to know him .
And it was said about Mohammed son of Ishaq : there were people living in the city that don’t know what they are living on , and after Ali son of Hussain (peace be upon him ) died – they missed what they used to receive at night … this is how righteous , gifts and charity should be hidden , and not to be filmed and showing the poor people in the social media !.
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