Many of us are preoccupied with financial matters, which occupy much of our attention and discussions. Almost no home is free from comments related to financial concerns: How should we deal with an emergency given our limited budget? Shouldn’t we reduce the children’s expenses? Our new neighbors must have a lot of money; just look at the kind of cars they drive. The unstable market conditions have affected our financial situation.

Hearing such comments and discussions, even accidentally, makes children aware of the importance of money and of the fact that limited financial resources can threaten the security of the family.

As parents, we should try not to expose our children to such worries. In many cases, the result can be the opposite of what is intended. Children may become afraid and try to prove that money does not control their lives. They may do this either by ignoring the value of money or by spending it excessively without any awareness or consideration. This behavior has been observed in children who take advantage of trips to stores to buy things they do not actually need, simply because they feel that doing so helps them get rid of the frustration and despair they experience from time to time.

Even if you parents are careful not to discuss financial matters in front of your children, they will still understand that their family’s lifestyle and maintaining the standard of living they enjoy depend on your income. Many children also appreciate the role of a working mother in supporting her family and going to work to help improve their standard of living.

There are many questions in the minds of most parents concerning this subject, mainly about how and when we can teach our children the importance of money and the proper ways of spending it. Above all, it is recommended that children be taught these lessons at an early age so that they eventually become part of their lives and habits that remain with them as they grow older.

Let us begin when the child reaches the age of two. We should not underestimate such a young age. At this stage, we can teach the child the importance of cooperation and participation among family members. For example, we can encourage the child to participate in simple household routines, such as collecting socks and putting them in the laundry basket. This gives the child a wonderful feeling that he or she is contributing something useful to the family.

At the age of four or five, the child is ready to understand the concept of receiving an allowance. However, the allowance should not be presented as payment for work performed, because household chores are responsibilities that everyone in the family should participate in. Rather, the allowance should be used as a way of teaching the child how to handle money properly.

Parents should be careful not to use money as a means of punishment or reward. Doing so may cause the child to develop an unhealthy understanding of the value of money. Remember that the purpose of giving an allowance is to teach the child responsibility and proper financial behavior.

The process does not end with simply giving the child an allowance. Parents should help the child develop ideas about how to use it. For example, we could suggest dividing the allowance into three portions: one for daily spending, a second for saving, and the final portion for helping the poor.

An allowance can also teach children the concept of delayed gratification, in which they save until they have enough money to buy some or all of the things they want. There is nothing wrong with telling a child, for example: “If you save $30 from your allowance, we will help you complete the amount needed to buy the bicycle you want.” Parents can then help the child learn how to save the required amount and guide him or her toward the proper way of doing so.

The supermarket is also one of the best places to teach a child the value of money. Even a preschool child can participate by handing money to the cashier and receiving the change. When the child grows a little older and becomes skilled at using a calculator, we can ask him or her to use this skill to help us calculate the total cost of the items we are buying.

After completing the calculation, we can give the child the total amount to hand to the supermarket cashier and collect the change, if there is any. Certainly, every visit to the supermarket can be a unique experience for a child, during which he or she takes responsibility for purchasing items for the family. This may encourage the child to become interested in budgeting, which is an excellent life skill.

Take your children with you to the bank. If they ask questions about what happens there, explain in simple terms what the employees do, such as depositing money, opening an account, and investing money. There is nothing wrong with opening an account in your child’s name if he or she expresses a desire to have one. In this way, the child will become familiar with depositing and withdrawing money from the bank. It will also encourage the child to save more money, deposit it in the bank, and observe how the savings grow.

A teenager’s allowance can also be increased to cover some of his or her personal needs, such as books, clothing, and other necessities. In this way, managing money becomes an important step toward independence.

Many parents may wonder whether they should allow their children to use their credit cards, especially when some of their peers are allowed to do so. A child may say to his or her parents: “Abu Majid allows his son to use his credit card.” It is therefore very important for each family to establish its own rules according to its circumstances.

You might allow your children to use your cards only on certain occasions and from time to time. This can also help your son or daughter feel that you trust them to handle such responsibility appropriately. For example, you might say: “Okay, I will give you the card today to buy the books you need, but I will need it back tonight.”

During shopping trips with children for various purposes, parents will inevitably hear the familiar sentence: “Mom, I need this.” If the mother feels that the child truly needs the item, she can say: “Okay, I can buy it, but you need to contribute part of its cost from your own allowance.” At that point, the child may realize that the item is not actually something he or she needs.

Teaching children the difference between the concepts of “I need” and “I want” is very important because it helps them understand other aspects of life as well. A child who considers wants and needs to have the same value may have difficulty understanding how things work and may face considerable difficulty finding a reasonable middle ground when dealing with different situations in life.

Another problem is the comparisons children make between their family’s income and the greater income of others. For example, a child might say: “Hashim received twice as much money as I did for Eid,” or “Tariq was given a bicycle because he succeeded at school, but I didn’t receive one even though I succeeded too.”

In such situations, parents might respond: “I wish I could do that, but it is beyond our financial means. Even if it were not, I would still want you to contribute toward buying such things from your own allowance, in addition to what we will give you later.”

Money needs to be associated with responsibility: the responsibility of saving, the responsibility of sharing with others, and the responsibility of spending wisely and reasonably.

Unfortunately, our societies do not always help put this principle into practice, nor is this necessarily the message that prevails. Instead, a common perception is that money equals power: the more money you have, the greater your influence and authority. Being poor, on the other hand, is sometimes viewed as having no power at all and being incapable.

Children learn from their parents and imitate the behavior they see at home. Our values reach them through our actions much faster and more powerfully than through the words we speak. If we want to teach our children the true value of money, we must act accordingly and appreciate the responsibility that comes with it.

We want to teach them that we work to earn money, that we save some of it for difficult times, and that we give some of it to those in need and to the poor.