A caring and loving mother can provide a safe base from which her son can explore his world. But even the most caring and caring mothers may sometimes find it difficult to give her son the freedom he needs. Your relationship with your son needs to breathe, meaning there needs to be room for the two of you to come together and then separate gently. You will need time and space to take care of yourself and your relationship as an adult, and your son needs space to gain confidence and independence.
Make room for growth
Some women suffer from the problem of allowing their children to mature. They love childhood days and are happy to take care of all the material and emotional needs of their young children. But little boys need to grow up. In his book how to Turn Boys into Men Without a Man Around the House, Dr. Richard Bromfield calls these mothers “child keepers.” When a mother clings to her son for too long, insists on keeping him as a child, and refuses to allow him to become independent, she makes him “fall behind his companions, and he becomes less able to tolerate frustration, assume responsibility, and interact socially.” These mothers can hinder the normal development of their children by becoming attached to them to the point of preventing them from becoming emancipated and independent.
To truly love your son means teaching him the skills and behaviors he needs in order for him to eventually leave you. When your son establishes his own life, you will realize that you have taught him to work independently and become a healthy, self-confident man. Independence does not mean the end of love and communication, but rather it is the beginning of a new phase in your relationship with your son.
Over time, your son will begin to move away from you, spending time with his new friends and practicing his new activities. Taking care of your physical, emotional, and spiritual health is an essential component of raising your child. He must know that his mother has her own life, which makes him free to live his life.
Other relationships
As your child grows, he will develop new friendships and relationships outside the family. Some of these friendships will not include you, especially as he enters adolescence... not in a direct way, at least. A wise mother understands that she will not remain first in her son's life forever. The importance of other relationships with friends and perhaps intimate girlfriends will increase as your son grows and matures.
Your ability to listen will serve you well as your child builds his own life. The old proverb says, “If you love someone, give him freedom.” This is the case with your son who is growing up; He will be happy to stay in touch with you when you can open your hand and allow him to try out his own wings and fly away.
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